U&ME Communicating in Moments that Matter


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How’s the quality of your life?

Are you as happy as you’d like to be? Feeling satisfied with your job?

Getting along well with family members? Experiencing serenity, at least some of the time? Do you think your life situation is contributing to your longevity or pushing you toward an early grave?

Nothing is more critical to the quality of our lives than our relationships, and nothing is more critical to our relationships than how we communicate.

U&ME: Communicating in Moments that Matter shows how to improve the quality of your life by improving your everyday communicating. In the first part of the book, you’ll learn the connection between effective communication and The Big Question, “What does it mean to be human?”

 Chapter 3 explains four differences between impersonal and interpersonal contacts, so you can make your communicating as personal as possible. The next seven chapters describe how to improve your texting, emailing, meeting management, and mentoring, your dating and parenting, your relationship with your spouse, your work projects, and your political communicating. The concepts in U&ME are research-based, and the dozens of practical skills have been tested by thousands of spouses, parents, students, managers, teachers, and religious leaders.


  • Preface
  • Chapter 1
  • Moments that matter
  • Chapter 2
  • Making your communication as personal as Possible
  • Chapter 3
  • Meeting and mis-meeting online
  • Chapter 4
  • Dating and courtship agony and ecstasy
  • Chapter 5
  • Family friends and family enemies
  • Chapter 6
  • On the job: everybody’s leadership
  • & listening
  • Chapter 7
  • Moments that matter in learning situations
  • Chapter 8
  • Personal politics
  • Chapter 9
  • Multicultural moments that matter
  • Chapter 10
  • Spiritual/religious meetings and Mis-meetings
  • Chapter 11
  • As personal as possible
  • Endnotes

Author Bio:

John Stewart, Ph.D. is Emeritus Professor of Communication at the University of Washington and the University of Dubuque. He has been an executive trainer with Fortune 500 companies and his interpersonal communication book, Bridges Not Walls has sold over half a million copies. He has also written articles, chapters, and books about listening, dialogue, small group facilitation, team-building, language, and communication ethics. He lives with his wife, Becky in Dubuque, Iowa